My Birthdays for the past Two Years

Remembering the past two years of my birthday.

My birthday with THEM and with HIM

Five days to go before the day. This time, as I tried to think of something I could write.

THOSE BIRTHDAYS SURPRISE WITH COLLEGE FRIENDS AND DABARKADS

While thinking of something to write, I had an opportunity to talk to one of my long time college friend and dabarkads (he's also a Christian) through twitter, Mr. John Mojica. It's a nice conversation as we tried to know what's happening to each of us through our career and our life as a whole. It's already a year or more since we are able to see each other and what a gladness I have to be able to communicate with him again. I remember a particular date, December 16, 2005, it is my 19th birthday and It is also our campus (URSB) christmas party. On that date, I have to travel from kapitolyo to our school to attend the party (I'm a student office that time, we are the organizer of the party so we're required to attend). I don't even know what is happening, but all of them is making me on a rush to come to the party without telling me the real reason, they just want me to come and it makes me irritated somehow. With much of my surprise, as i come to the school, then here they are prohibiting me from entering our office and telling me to stay outside, I was a little mad since I am already tired that night. They let me stay for about 30 minutes and after that they call me to enter the office and then, "Surprise, Happy birthday".. they made that day one of the memorable birthdays that I have. They know that I am tired, and them as well but they made a special night just for my birthday, they even forgot the party outside the office just to made time for me to celebrate and greet me. I will always remember that day and the "master planners" of that is Jocolyn, David and John (Mojica).

In December 16, 2008, my last birthday in the institution (URSB), another memorable birthday that I have. All of them (my barkada) assemble in the library with a participation with Mam Mallari (URSB Head Librarian). After my 2pm class, they texted me to go to the Library which we usually does. I go to the library without hesitation thinking that they will just try tease me to made a blow-out since it is my birthday. Much of a surprise, they are not there and I tried to ask the assistant librian and told me that they didn't know where they are. So with that, I intend to go back to my room and wait for my next class then suddenly all of them appeared in my back, with foods (pansit and others). i don't expect it but they'd made there voluntary contribution just to come up with it and to celebrate my birthday. What a wonderful birthday that I have. I am very thankful to the LORD that he had given me friends like them.

In December 16, 2011, although only few of them come, I was able to celebrate my birthday with them again. It's a one of a memorable one, that even all of us are busy, all of us specially them are able to give time to celebrate. I thank God for it.

MY BIRTHDAYS WITH MY BEST FRIENDS

December 16, 2006, It's the time of the year when all of us are busy specially in the Worship Ministry since we usually have a concert during this month. If there is something that makes my birthday memorable, that is those times when I, Manuel and Iking used to eat at william's (sa baba ng palangoy) to eat fried chicken being finance by none other iking. Those are the times when we are still young and we cherish every moment that we are together. We also have our yearly tradition that we buy a set of polo, with the same design but different color and sizes specially done to commemorate our friendship. Right now we are busy with our careers and in the ministry, being scattered with the 3 churches of kapasan but still, our friendship grows stronger and deeper even though we don't have regular time of being with each others.

MY BIRTHDAY WITH THE ETWF

December 16, 2009 & 2010, It's the years where in I open our home for the ETWF worship team and youth to celebrate my birthday in our house. It's the first time in 2009 that I did it and it brings a lot of gladness to see those people to be in our house to celebrate my birthday. One of the memorable things that i receive on that day, is a simple but very precious and valuable gift that they had given to be. a BIG Birthday Card with message and pictures of them greeting me a happy and blessed birthday. I was to touch that I keep that Card until now. In December 18, 2012, a post celebration of my birthday is also made with them.

MY BIRTHDAY WITH MY OFFICEMATE

December 15, 2011, that day I was still at Caliraya in laguna. It's my last day of duty there, as I was going to prepare to travel back home, My boss, Sir Ariel learned that it's my birthday. Without hesitation, knowing that it is my birthday, he give me money to buy Ice Cream and treat people at the back office of Caliraya Resort. My boss is not an expressive guy, that through that, He made a lasting message of greeting for my Birthday. I also remember Sir Lito, my manager in my 2nd work. He treat us in a restaurant when he learned that it is my birthday, how could I forget that. It is during December 15, 2008 that Sir Lito treat us for my birthday.

MY BIRTHDAY WITH MY FAMILY

If there are people who is always present that makes my birthday special even without the treat, even without the luxurious food and even without the gifts, it is my family that is always complete and present during my birthday. From my childhood until now, they are on of the reason why my birthday is special and memorable. My nanay, tatay, kuya mike and jepoy. My Family that I love and who love me. My family who is not perfect but given by God as a gift and as a blessing in my life.

MY BIRTHDAY WITH THE LORD

Every year, if I have a memorable birthday, it is not just because of the people that I am with. But most importantly, It is because of GOD is with me all the time. In every seconds, every minute, every hour and every days of my life, The LORD is there to cheer me up and strengthens me when I'm weak, to give me wisdom when I don't know what to do, to encourage me in my time of disappointment and to rescue me in times of my troubles. I will not have a meaningful birthday without HIM in my life. He made my life Blessed.

This is a short summary of how YAHWEH make my life blessed specially in every birthday that I have

To YAHWEH be the glory, honor and praise.

Six Days to go before the day...

Psalms 118:24  This is the day that the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Six days to go, and it will be my day. I’m going to celebrate not just because it’s the day when I made it on earth but because God had made wonderful things in my life for the past years. As that day comes, it’s neither about me nor the people around but it is about HIM who made my life joyful, happy and blessed. As I start to reminisce the past years, all that I can see is I who had a lot of shortcomings and a lot of weakness, but I’m thankful and grateful for there is the people by whom God had use to guide me, teach me and protect. People who had been there with a lot of patience and tolerance on my attitude and character, who is there to encourage and to help, who is there to help me adjust with the changes and cope up with the people that I’m with for the second or for the first time. But most importantly, I’m grateful and thankful for YAHWEH is always there to sustain, strengthen, equip, enable and empower me to do HIS will and plan.

This year is more of an adjustment year, as God move me from another place into a more familiar but different one to serve HIM and fulfill HIS mission and vision not just in my life but for HIS people, the CHURCH. Sometimes, I could see myself as a person who is not fitted for service of HIM but as Satan tries to discourage me, God’s truth is there to comfort and encourage. It’s not about whom I am that I was here and serving HIM but it’s about YAHWEH who was always there to show that HE can use people regardless of who they are or what they can do.

This year is a year where I have to cry because of personal pains brought by personal experiences and a “pleading” for YAHWEH to change and correct my heart to follow HIS will. It’s a year where in I have to cry for the people that by whom had been I had been attach and learned to love for the past years of ministry. It’s a year where I miss a lot of people whom I regularly see every week and for some who had to go to follow God’s calling.  Whether it is at work (secular) or at ministry, there are a lot of new things that I’ve learned and develop.

This is a year that God had made a lot of things in my life and a blessed year that comes from HIM. I am not perfect, I am such a defective one that could be considered useless but I have a “perfect God” who could repair all “defective things” and make it “effective” to do HIS will and a “God of Worth” who could give “value” to useless thing for HIS glory.

Thank You YAHWEH for loving me, caring for me and saving me. Six days from now, it will be my day or it could be better to say that it’s “the day that YAHWEH had made another wonderful creation” (that’s me). It’s not about the created one but it’s about the “Creator”.

To YAHWEH be the glory, honor and praise.

"GOD ANSWERS" a song composition inspired by Psalms 34

Upon reading some chapter in the book of psalm, during my bible reading, chapter 34 just caught-up my attention and the scripture on this particular portion struck me. The LORD reveal and taught me of lot of things about HIM and He started helping me create a poem thru the words on the said chapter and afterwards some melody came to my mind. Then, suddenly the poem had been arranged in such a way that it becomes a song of worship for the LORD. As Psalms 34, in David's testimony he proclaim that YAHWEH is the Provider and Deliverer who always listen to us whenever we call and always answer our deepest needs. The song entitled "God Answers" is dedicated to YAHWEH who is the reason why I keep singing and writing songs. All the Glory and Honor to YOU oh YAHWEH.

GOD’S ANSWERS
Words and Music by "Marc Ross"

I.
I will bless the LORD forever,
I will praise You now and ever,
My soul will boast in the LORD
The humble will hear it and rejoice

II.
For the LORD is good and faithful
He’s our rescue in times of trouble
He’s our refuge and stronghold
Come and find HIM now

Refrain:
O magnify the LORD my soul
And Fear the LORD with all my heart
How blessed it is to be with HIM
With Him

Chorus:
I called to Him, and He answered
And delivered me from all my fears
And this poor man cried,
The LORD will hear,
Saved him from all troubles,
The LORD redeems and provides,
And you will never be condemn,
The righteous will cry,
The LORD will hear,
He will be our comfort.

III.
Looked to Him and see His glory,
That shines to bring us hope,
To restore and heal our broken hearts,
The LORD will make us whole again



***Marc Ross is a pen name of Dennis Ross Roda.

Someday, I will have a beautiful daughter and princess like her

This is trixie (pong-gay) as they call her. I just met this cute, charming and beautiful girl on the night of her auntie's wedding (shine and albert's wedding). Someday, I will also have a beautiful, cute and charming daughter and princess just like her.

“MY ATE MARY JANE”

“Ate”, is a word that I usually heard from everyone but a word that always come to my mind every time this day, November 1 had come. I don’t usually talk about it especially when people are asking whom I preferring with every time I’m telling them that I used to go the cemetery to see my “ate”. And every time this topic about my ate is brought-out, there is a sadness that comes out within me and it makes me cry in an instant without knowing the reason why I have this feeling. My “ate”, born on January on the year 1984 is the only daughter that my parents have. When she came on this earth, it brings a lot of joy to my parents and even to my eldest brother (kuya mike). After a year, she celebrated her birthday and everybody is happy as the young girl already marks her first year on earth. But after that day, unexpected things happens and she had been diagnosed with measles (tigdas), during that time it is epidemic and brought a lot of pain to families whose family members had died because of it and one of those who died, is none other than my “ate”. It brings a lot of depression and sadness to my parents, the moment my ate succumbed to a epidemic decease such as measles (tigdas). It was on March 1985 that “Mary Jane R. Roda” died and leave this earth and goes back to the creator, my “ate” died at a very young age. After a year, in December 16, 1986 a new born baby with a name of “Dennis” existed on earth. I was born a year after my “ate” died, but since childhood I was told that I have an “ate” and we always come to cemetery on November 1 just to visit her. I don’t know why talking about my “ate” always brings me to the point that I am crying and It brings this sudden sadness. I don’t even have to see her but talking about her is the conversation that I always want to avoid because I know that it will only make me cry. Thinking about things that happen, I realized that the reason why I always become sad and cry every time topics about my “ate” is brought out might be because from the moment I was in the womb of my mother, I felt the sadness that my mother has due to the passing away of my “ate”. Sounds weird but it might be one of the reason why I also feel sad when conversation about her is being made. But as years pass by, I thought this feeling of sadness will gone regarding about my “ate”, but the sad story is it’s not. Instead of disappearance, this sad feeling becomes stronger and stronger that talking about my “ate” brings me to tears. I don’t know why, but something is within me that I always feel this way. As I reflected on this, I realized something about me. I am a person who always long to have an “ate”. I never experience to have an “ate”, within the family all of my siblings are boys and I never had a chance to live a life of having an “ate” or “older sister”. How I wish that I could have an “ate” that I could tell things about myself, things about how I feel and things about my personal life. I don’t know if it right to say that I miss my “ate mary jane” even if I don’t even see her throughout my life, but it might be better to say that “I really want that I have an “ate” and how I wish that she had not died”. Even if I don’t ever have a chance to see my “ate”, I know that I have an “ate” and in the future I will be seeing her again. I thank God that even if I don’t ever met her, God gave me an “ate” and given more ate right now. They might not be my biological “ate’s” but for sure they are the one God had given so that I might have the preview of things that would be if my “ate mary jane” ever live. “In everything, God has a purpose and that is what I’m holding on and I’m entrusting everything to YAHWEH.” Thank You YAHWEH.to You, all the glory, honor and praise.

Someday... The Wedding Prayer

Someday, when the day comes I want this song to be included in my wedding day. To whom, whoever she is.. More than being married someday, what I want is that I and together with her, we will give glory to HIM. To be more in love with You oh LORD that I may Love “her” more. “u” :)

Someday... The Wedding Prayer

Someday, when the day comes I want this song to be included in my wedding day. To whom, whoever she is.. More than being married someday, what I want is that I and together with her, we will give glory to HIM. To be more in love with You oh LORD that I may Love “her” more. “u” :)

I want to go HOME to the place where the LORD is

Five more days and I am going back to my home at Rizal. The excitement is relived every time that I was here in laguna and the boredom already attacked me. “I want to go home already”, it’s the same statement that is in my head after some days of stay here in laguna. I feel like I missed a lot of things, people, events and opportunities every time that I was here in laguna to render my services and act on my responsibility as an employee of the company. Although the advantage of being here is I have a lot of time to have a rest since I don’t have to travel a far and for an hour just to go home since my “hotel” where I stay is just around the corner of the resort but the thing is, “I am alone” (physically) and I have to fight the boredom. There’s a lot of things to be thankful, actually I was thankful that the LORD had given me this opportunity to have a rest whenever I was assigned here in laguna but when Saturday and Sunday comes, i felt sad every time I realized that it supposedly the time that I must spent in serving HIM and just because of my work I had missed a lot of time and privileges. It sounds like I was complaining but definitely not, I know the reality and truth that if ever I was here in laguna, it was never been meant to make me “alone” and to feel “lonely” but there is a purpose that the LORD had for me. One thing that I always pray is that The LORD always reveal to me the purpose of my stay here in laguna. Yes, it might be because of my duty as an employee that I was here but looking unto it in a deeper perspective only shows that HE has a purpose. So what is that purpose? After four days of thinking, late night sleep (actually very late that I was sleeping in about 3am up to 4am in the morning) and hours of staring at the ceiling of my room, the LORD make me realized one truth, “Whenever, Wherever and Whatever I am doing, It is an opportunity for me to serve HIM”. It’s all depend of what is inside my heart and who is inside in it?

The reality, the privilege to serve the LORD had never been lost, its only us who thinks we lost it. We lost the so-called “privilege to serve the LORD” whenever we think that what we are doing whether it is a work or study is a not a way of serving HIM. We only lost the opportunity to serve the LORD whenever our work takes out our desire, passion and love for the LORD. The only thing that we lost as much as I experience together with other working Christian Professionals whenever we work is the fellowship with the brethren. That fellowship that we missed is something that might be good specially when it bring us to have a heart who is longing to have a fellowship and a deep understanding that we need the presence of our brethren to keep the burning desire of continuing in walking on God’s path (Holiness and Righteousness). But, most important thing is our relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, If we have a good, better and continuously growing relationship with our LORD and SAVIOR, we will never feel that we our alone. We might be alone “physically” as per humans perspective but in reality, as “Christian” and “servant of Christ”, He will always be with us and never leave us so that we will never be alone.

This is some of the things that the LORD had taught me as I spent time in meditating HIS Word and evaluating things. I was excited to go home, excited to be in the place where the LORD is, excited to experience the fellowship with the brethren and together we will be serving HIM. To YAHWEH be all the glory, honor, praise and worship.

When God Writes Your Love Story

Do you ever watch a love story and at the end you are not satisfy with how two protagonist ended with each other? Many people would say, “ang pangit ng ending” ( the ending is not good) and would probably say that “sana ganito ang naging ending..” (I wish it’ll be ended like this). Well, its a common response everytime we watch films and it end up beyond or different from what we expect or the way the ending would be. I always told my friends when they are telling those words that, “wala tayong magagawa, hindi naman tayo ang director” (we can’t do anything about it since we are not the director). In our lives or in our own love story, sometimes we are also commanding and dictating the way our story should become inspite of the fact that like just the movie, there is a director that must be followed. Because of we are the one who choose to be the director of our life instead of God, we ended up being discouraged and being hurt because we didn’t want to follow the director of the movie entitled “our life”. Just like a movie, sometimes we want to fast forward things and get to the highlights or the climax without seeing the events that must happen before it and at the end, all that we have is regrets because we had made a wrong decisions and judgements.

Who is the author of your love story? Is it you? The reality is this, we may have the right to choose the thing that we wanted for our life specially in our lovelife but we cannot choose the consequence of every decisions that we make in our lives. Just like a movie, we are just a mere actor and actress and the director is the one who create the directions of the story.

Who is the director of our love story? Is it your family, friends or environment by where you belong? Your family might be a good choice to consider in making decisions about your lovelife but still, the reality is that they are still human and could also make ideas that is wrong. Our friends could also be a good choice but sometimes they can only make you do things to tolerate you from doing what you want just to make you happy and even the environment or the culture where you belong doesn’t make sense specially these days that it was corrupted and distorted.

Who is the director of your love story? Whether it is a director or an author, the best person that you could ever rely on is none other than HIM, The LORD. From the very start, HE has a good plan for our lives including our lovelife. HE also created the biggest greatest love story on earth, and it is not just a story but a reality that God had become flesh, a human just like us to take all the punishment, climb up the hill with a cross in HIS back and carry all the sin and died for us so that the Beautiful plan that the LORD had for us may happen. Would you like GOD to be the author or director of your love story? God is love and if there is someone who can direct your life particularly your lovelife, is it none other the the LORD who is the the author and beginning of LOVE. The LOVE that leads us to heaven and eternal life is the LOVE of the LORD. If HE is the author of your love story, everything will be ok knowing that HE has set a happy, good and beautiful ending to your love story. A love story who had been founded and rooted in HIS love will end with a “beautiful ending”, you and your partner being in the presence of GOD in heaven forever.

Would you want HIM to be the author of your love story? Well I do want, how about you?

Inside The White Room

I open my eyes and had been shock to see that I was in a white room. There is no window and door on this room. Everywhere I turn my eyes, all I can see is white walls, white ceiling and white floors. I am on a panic that all that is in my mind is that I am stock in this place and there’s no way for me to get out. When I started screaming, suddenly my eyes had been opened as my “nanay” try to wake me up because I was having a nightmare. As i seen my nanay, I was so thankful that it is only a dream and wishing that I will not be in that place again. It happens when I was still 7 years old.

10 years after that freaky and weird nightmare had happened, one night when I come from my school tired and exhausted I get early to my bed and fall asleep. Suddenly, a sound of something like someone is knocking at the door just ruin my sleep so I forcefully try to push myself up and wake up from sleeping, and as I open my eyes, I was shock to see that I was in the white room again.

After ten years, I was in the same room again, nothing had change aside from a door is already existing compare to the last time that I had been there. As i rush near to the door intending to open it, I found out that it is lock and whatever I do it can’t be open. I try to shout for help hoping that someone’s gonna hear and help me but it seems that no one is there aside from me. I was teary and praying to God, pleading for His help that I might get out of the weird white room or to wake me up from this nightmare if this is only a bad dream. I felt the feeling of loneliness knowing that I am alone and already spending a lot of my time in this white room. I want to get out from it from I don't know how until a sound coming from the door had got my attention, someone had opening the door from the outside. I stand up and run rushing to the door and as I am going to open it, my eyes had been opened again and I realize that it’s another nightmare as my nanay and kuya almost slapping my face for me to wake up. Again, for the second time I was very thankful that it is only a dream and I had able to get out of it.

I don’t want to get back on that place, never again. Four years had past and I am already in my last year in college. That day is the busiest day ever in my life, our qualifying exams, which took place on Saturday and Sunday as we spent eight hours of non-stop draining exams. As expected, I got home very tired and prefer to go to my bed and sleep early rather than to go at the kitchen and eat something to filled my empty stomach. I fell asleep, and then i felt that someone is trying to wake me up from sleeping so I opened my eyes thinking that my brother might making some fun with me while I was sleeping. I open my eyes and what I see makes me terrified that I was in the same white room again but this time aside from a door, there is already a window. In my desperation to get out of that room, thinking that it is only a mere nightmare, I try to slap my face to make myself be awaken. I did my best to slap my face but nothing’s happening and I still at the white room and it seems that I am not dreaming or either it is a nightmare. Slowly, I stand up and walk close to the door and tried to open it and i found out that it is locked from the outside. Since the door is lack, I’ve try to see if the windows is also locked and it is indeed locked. I don’t want to panic so I try to think of what I can do in those times and without any means of getting out from the white room, I started to pray and ask the LORD of what HE want to tell me with the instances that I was in the white room for the third time.

While I am praying, the window had been opened and it stop me. I get up and stand, slowly walking near the window and try to see what’s in the outside. As i get my face near to the window, I was surprised to see that it looks like a television screen with a movie being played. As i watch closely, what I see is my church mates who keeps on waking up a person. As i look closely, I see that it was me, unconscious and had fall down after leaning on the door of the comfort room. I was in a panic that I already thinking that I might be dead already until the door of the white room had opened by itself. I run as fast as I can to get out of that room by passing by the open door and then a strange light blinded me and as I open my eyes, four people is already lifting me. It took me a couple of minute before I regain my strength and be able to get up by myself. My best friend just told me that I had collapse while waiting outside the comfort room to take my turn to get inside. From that day, as mommy who is a nurse try to treat me and get my blood pressure find out that I am already high blood. That is the day that I had know that something’s wrong with my body.
Until now, i was thinking of why I was in that white room repeatedly. I don’t know why, but what i know is, “God want me take care of HIS temple”. I don’t want to be in that white room again.

CHRIST COMPASSION

Jesus is compassionate to all people. This is the truth that the LORD had taught as i read, meditate amd study HIS word specifically in John chapter 4. This chapter speaks about the samaritan woman by whom had the greatest time of her life when he got face to face with the Lord Jesus Christ. With the story of the encounter of the samaritan woman, there are 5 things by which the LORD shows compassion to us.

1. "your life matters to HIM (The Lord Jesus)"

what ever is your darkest past, what ever is your failures in life, whatever bad things you had done in your past, this is not what the Lord is looking or trying to find to us. Want matters to HIM is your life, HE cares for us that give everything even HIS life on the cross that we might see that there is a way for us to be frred from all the sin that is slaving us, that makes us worthless and without a good future. Your life matters to HIM, thats the very reason why HE died at the Cross that you might find the life with purpose and worth of living with the assurance of salvation through HIM.

2. "HIS priority is a ministry for a person"

The LORD want us to experince HIS marvelous and wondrous work in our lives. His priority is to work in our lives that HE might changes us and transform us into HIS image.

3. "HIS priority is to proclaim the Truth"

the truth is this, we are all sinner just like the samaritan woman. Because of our sin, what we deserve is eternal punishment at hell. But because the LORD has compassion for us, HE came from heaven unto the earth to show us that there is a way for us to be saved and to experience God's presence in our life. The LORD had to deal with our sins and HE chose the path going to the cross that all that will truly belive (faith) in HIM might find freedom from sin unto God's righteousness.

4. "The LORD has the Power to give contentment in our lives"

we are all longing for something that makes our life uncomfortable and not good at all. Just like the samaritan, The LORD has it all to satisfy our thirst. Not like an ordinary water, the living water of that comes from the LORD gives a lot of contentment in our life. Contentment because what the LORD had given to us is a total package of Love, Mercy, Grace, Joy, Eternal Life and Forgiveness. What more can we ask more? And lastly,

5. "The LORD has the Power to change our Lives"

whatever things that you might done in the past, it is not a prerequisite to God's grace to us. But one thing is certain, the LORD wants to change us and be transform and become HIS soul winners. Working with a renewed and a heart that is always after to HIS will.

Thank you LORD for you are always there. My life matters to the LORD. To God be the glory.